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Fashionably Dead in Diapers
- Narrated by: Jessica Almasy
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
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Publisher's summary
And I thought being half Vampyre/half Demon was hard.... That's nothing compared to being a mother. Sweet baby Moses in a boob tube, there aren't any books on raising True Immortals, so let me give you a few tips....
Make a map of every closet and bathroom in your home if you enjoy having sex. Sleep deprivation can cause confusion, and a map will help if you have only seven minutes and 31 seconds. You're welcome.
Parenting books are useless if you're not human. If your child is half Vampyre/half Demon, I would suggest not using parenting books at all - they can backfire like a mother humper. Trust me on this.
Have sex.
When your child tells you he has an imaginary friend, do not discount this as fantasy. Oftentimes your child isn't imagining anything. If he persists with alarming and violent stories about this fictional buddy, it's probably a Troll. Do a thorough search of your home, and kill it. Decapitation works best. Some imaginary friends are harmless. However, it's wise not to take chances.
Have sex again.
When in large crowds, make sure you hold tight to your child's hand. Losing a child in an amusement park is terrifying. If you're truly paranoid, you could consider putting a chip in your child. If you do this, don't discuss it at dinner parties. People will think you are weird.
At least cuddle.
Playing with dolls is fun. Being one? No so much. If your child ever finds a Genie in a bottle, flush it immediately. Many children wish for things that are very difficult to reverse...like being doll sized. If this happens, move to Oz. There are many people of small stature there. And yes, it really does exist.
Find a closet, and go to town.
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Say my name b**ch! A porny, Xmas, litRPG short
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 11-07-21
By: A.J. Markam
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Afterlife
- Afterlife Saga, Book 1
- By: Stephanie Hudson
- Narrated by: Rebecca Rainsford
- Length: 26 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Afterlife...just some gothic nightclub where gossip is fuelled by the presence of a rich and unearthly, handsome family or afterlife...the strange place where time seems to stand still and guests feel the presence of something more powerful held within the confines of the VIP. Keira is new to this small, cold town and is running from a past that seems to feast on her darkest memories. She finds living with her sister away from English soil to be just the ticket to the new life she is trying desperately to find.
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It is a good book yet it is NOT in many ways
- By Lexi on 11-29-16
By: Stephanie Hudson
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Captured
- Devil's Blaze MC, Book 1
- By: Jordan Marie
- Narrated by: Morgan Tyler, Leo Barnabas
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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There's an animal in me that I keep hidden. Beth calls to him. She tempts the monster and lures him to the surface. I'm obsessed with her. I can't stay away, even when doing so puts my entire club in danger. Her blood is on my hands. I formed her to fit only me. I was her first and if I have to kill everyone in our way. So be it. I will be her last. She is mine.
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Good Grief
- By BarbaraY on 10-15-17
By: Jordan Marie
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Darkness of Light
- Darkness, Book 1
- By: Stacey Marie Brown
- Narrated by: Michelle Sparks
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Freak. Witch. Crazy. Schizo. Ember Brycin has been called them all. She's always known she's different. No one has ever called her normal, even under the best circumstances. Bizarre and inexplicable things continually happen to her, and having two different colored eyes, strange hair, and an unusual tattoo only contributes to the gossip about her. When the latest school explosion lands her in a facility for trouble teens, she meets Eli Dragen, who's hot as hell and darkly mysterious.
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should be titled, "Darkness and Frustration"
- By S. Gaona on 05-09-16
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The Unleashing
- Call of Crows, Book 1
- By: Shelly Laurenston
- Narrated by: Johanna Parker
- Length: 11 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Kera Watson never expected to face death behind a Los Angeles coffee shop. Not after surviving two tours lugging an M16 around the Middle East. If it wasn't for her hot Viking customer showing up too late to help, nobody would even have seen her die. In uncountable years of service to the Allfather Odin, Ludvig "Vig" Rundstrom has never seen anyone kick ass with quite as much style as Kera.
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Too Violent for this Reader
- By Aryn on 04-11-15
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Elemental Mating
- By: Milly Taiden
- Narrated by: Tyler Donne, Tess Irondale
- Length: 6 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Brilliant scientist Melinda Caster has discovered a new strain of the Zika virus that stimulates synaptic growth in embryos, causing neuron development beyond normal human levels. Way beyond, like ESP-levels of cognitive abilities. When the lab is broken into, Melinda realizes that someone has been keeping tabs on her research and wants it for themselves. A happy accident destroys critical data before it can fall into the wrong hands, but unfortunately that makes Melinda and her perfect memory a target.
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Good story!
- By NancyB on 11-27-17
By: Milly Taiden
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The Queen of Carnage
- Underestimated, Book 1
- By: Candice Wright
- Narrated by: Lucy Rivers
- Length: 7 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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After getting tangled up in Carnage business, it isn’t long before I'm tangled up in their sheets. They see is my blonde hair and sweet smile, and they want to dirty me up a little. I'm a splash of pink within the leather-clad army, standing out like a tampon in a condom factory. But it’s not my fault they underestimated me. I might like girly things, but I’m much more likely to spray you with bullets then sprinkle you with glitter. I could just tell them they have me labeled all wrong...but where’s the fun in that?
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Great book!
- By desi on 08-21-21
By: Candice Wright
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Death's Daughter
- By: Amber Benson
- Narrated by: Amber Benson
- Length: 9 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Calliope Reaper-Jones so just wanted a normal life: buying designer shoes on sale, dating guys from Craig’s List, web-surfing for organic dim-sum for her boss. But when her father - who happens to be Death himself - is kidnapped, and the Devil’s Protege embarks on a hostile takeover of the family business, Death, Inc., Callie returns home to assume the CEO mantle - only to discover she must complete three nearly impossible tasks in the realm of the afterlife first.
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Don't Stop After Chapter 1
- By Dana on 03-29-14
By: Amber Benson
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Royal Dragon
- By: Charlene Hartnady
- Narrated by: Stella Bloom, Sebastian York
- Length: 7 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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The eligible dragon shifter males must hunt a handful of females. It's first catch, first serve. The biggest problem is that the females are human. Despite feedback to the contrary, Coal thinks they are weak and breakable. In his opinion, not capable of surviving the hunt, let alone the mating that will follow. He doesn't believe that a lowly human is capable of birthing him a royal heir, so why has his brother, the king, tasked him with claiming one?
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VERY EROTIC
- By Edwina "I Love books" on 11-22-17
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Braving the Elements
- The Darkness Series, Book Two
- By: K.F. Breene
- Narrated by: Victoria Mei
- Length: 4 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Sasha has always known she was different, but now she also knows that the shadow men she’s seen all her life, are real. With a life goal of fitting in, Sasha hopes her strange abilities will finally make true friendship a possibility. Unfortunately, her magic doesn’t function like everyone else’s. What she thought would make her belong, sets her apart now more than ever. Stefan, all but promised to a different woman, has tried to keep his mind on his duties instead of the irresistible and free-spirited human.
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Love Stefan & Sasha
- By Madeleine East on 11-24-20
By: K.F. Breene
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Nameless: The Darkness Comes
- Bone Angel Trilogy, Book 1
- By: Mercedes M. Yardley
- Narrated by: Eva Kaminsky
- Length: 8 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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She has been dealing with the demonic all her life, so when her brother gets tangled up with a demon named Sparkles, "Luna the Lunatic" rolls in on her motorcycle to save the day. Armed with the ability to harm demons, her scathing sarcasm, and a hefty chip on her shoulder, Luna gathers the most unusual of allies, teaming up with a green-eyed heroin addict and a snarky demon of "some import". After all, outcasts of a feather should stick together...even until the end.
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It's nice to see some chicks still have guts!
- By sarah on 08-18-14
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Love in the Time of Dragons
- By: Katie MacAlister
- Narrated by: Barbara Rosenblat
- Length: 10 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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In best-selling author Katie MacAlister’s Love in the Time of Dragons, suburban mom Tully Sullivan wakes up in a far-off place surrounded by strangers—many of them muscular, sexy ones—claiming to be dragons. They insist Tully is a dragon, too, and that she’s committed crimes deserving of death. Now Tully must disprove the allegations before time runs out.
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Struggling to finish
- By Kindle Customer on 04-22-11
By: Katie MacAlister
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Undead and Unwed
- Queen Betsy, Book 1
- By: MaryJanice Davidson
- Narrated by: Nancy Wu
- Length: 9 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Waking up in a tacky coffin and wearing off-brand shoes, Betsy Taylor can't believe the horrible turn her life has taken; then she discovers she's a vampire. Soon, Betsy becomes a participant in a power struggle between the forces of darkness. With only her friend Jessica and the hunky vampire Sinclair to help her, this new "Queen of Vampires" will have a tough time getting her afterlife straight.
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Great Concept / Annoying Character
- By Vanessa on 07-28-09
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What listeners say about Fashionably Dead in Diapers
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Cheri
- 03-18-16
Holly Hotness This Story was Awesome!
Fashionably Dead in Diapers is another great additional to the Hot Damned series. It's insanely funny, sexy as sin, and never a dull moment.
Robyn Peterman has made it an art in creating funny, sassy, colorful phrases that will have you laughing out loud and with Jessica Almasy's flawless performance, she animates them superbly.
Astrid and Ethan are one of the funnies couples. They have their hands full with their new baby, Samuel, who is growing at an alarming rate, and has lots of powers and can animate inanimate objects like couches and chairs.... that's recipe for disaster. When they finally get some "alone time," their role playing fantasies will have you laughing out loud; however, when Samuel is kidnaped and Astrid losses her memory, things get really bad.
I have really enjoyed listening to this series, but be warned, if you do not like bad language, this story is full of justified bad language. Definitely worth the credit and time invested in listening to the story.
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12 people found this helpful
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- SCambra
- 02-20-16
Oh.My.Hell
Any additional comments?
Oh.My.Hell, Robyn Peterman has done it again! She's succeeded in making me laugh my ass off (I wish)! Only warning, do not read this after having a 2 day stomach bug. She can dream up some truly craptastic visuals that will leave you in tears!
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4 people found this helpful
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- Roxd1206
- 03-31-16
Astrid is at it again.
Would you listen to Fashionably Dead in Diapers again? Why?
Yes I would listen to this book again. I love Astrid and baby Samuel. The narrator is great.
Which scene was your favorite?
Any scene where Sammy causes trouble.
Any additional comments?
I love this series and will read/listen to everything that Robyn adds to it.
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3 people found this helpful
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- erobbins33
- 03-15-16
Best one yet!
Seriously, if the title of this review isn't enough, just go read the synopsis! "Sweet Baby Moses in a boob tube," says it all! You're welcome.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Terri
- 02-24-16
It's a laugh a minute...
What a great series! This is book 4 of the Hot Damned Series, Fashionably Dead in Diapers. It is a paranormal romance loaded with never ending humor and a narrator that only adds even more to that humor. In this story, we travel through the world of the Undead. Ethan and Astrid have a new baby, which turns out to be more work than anyone ever dreamed of. I laughed my butt off through out this book! It is an adventure for sure.
The author, Robyn Peterman did a fantastic job on this book. I love the new baby Samuel. He is so funny & so very smart! The narrator, Jessica Almasy did a fantastic job on her delivery of this story! I love the voices she uses. Very entertaining for sure.
I was gifted this audio book so I could read it and leave a honest review.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Weluvdopey
- 04-08-16
SO Funny!!
Any additional comments?
This is such a fun book; this is the fourth book in the Fashionably Dead: Hot Damned series written by Robyn Peterman and narrated by Jessica Almasy. Once I started listening to it I didn’t want to put it down until the end. This book is great, it is laugh out loud funny. Astrid and Ethan are back with a baby, Samuel. When and Evil Queen threatens Samuel, Astrid gets some help from her crazy friends and family. The book is full of insane and hilarious characters.
The narrator Jessica Almasy did a great job with this book. She did a great job with the different voices of each character in this book. It was very easy to listen to in one sitting and I didn’t want to stop listening until the end.
If you are looking for a great book with great characters then you need to listen to this book. I am looking forward to listening to the next book by this author and narrator.
A Review copy was provided to me in exchange for a fair and honest review. The free book held no determination on my personal review.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Amy Joslyn
- 04-08-16
awesome story you don't want to end!
wicked funny...can't help fall in love with all the people! she does a great job reading !
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2 people found this helpful
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- Robin
- 04-07-16
Very funny family!
One of the funniest series I have ever read, hope there are many more books to come and that baby doesn't grow up very quickly.
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- Dawn Stewart
- 03-25-16
Absolute fun
Another laugh out loud story that makes you smile. This time we had to make a trip to the land of faeries as some mother humper has taken Samuel and they have to go get him. Now for Astrid, Ethan, and the Kev it should be no problem. Well...at least until Astrid got knocked out and got amnesia. Yep now we are back to what we are used to. Strange and unusual fun. Lots of new friends and many laughs. Just what I like. I am so looking forward to the next story and laughs that go with it.
Jessica did another amazing job. Her timing and joy throughout make this story so great to listen to. Am looking forward to hearing many more.
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- jodic
- 04-16-16
So funny! Pure entertainment!
I love these books- they are so over the top they keep me laughing start to finish.
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